I did not cry then. But now I understand that grief takes its own time. Only now, after returning to my home in the UK, the grief has begun. Grief waited for the long journey back, for the unpacking of suitcases, for the return to familiar routines. It waited until I was alone. Quietly, it found its way in, slowly and then all at once, catching up with me in ways I hadn’t expected.

Now it arrives in unexpected moments. In the stillness of the morning, late at nights, in quiet moments, when everything else falls away. I find myself thinking of him in the ordinary parts of life, the things I would have shared, the conversations we will never have again.

My father was a man of few words. He did not often speak of love, nor did he need to. His love was constant and unspoken. It was there in the small things. He showed it not through what he said, but through what he did….his presence, his patience, his steadiness and reliability, the quiet way that he was always there.

As a child, I did not always notice it. As an adult, I understood it more. And now, in his absence, I feel it most of all.

I think of the times he listened more than he spoke, offering just enough to guide without ever imposing. I think of the steadiness he brought into our lives, a quiet strength that asked for nothing in return. He was not a man who needed to be seen to be known …..he simply was, and that was enough.

Now I find myself thinking about Mum constantly. Losing a partner after 67 years together is an unimaginable loss. Dad was not only her husband, but also her companion, her routine, and such a central part of her everyday life. No words can truly express how difficult this must be for her.

I notice the quiet ways in which Mum is trying to remain close to him. She sleeps on Dad’s side of the bed and wears his shirts every day. These may seem like small things, but they show how much she misses him and how deeply their life together is woven into her heart.

Mum continues to show remarkable strength and composure, often giving the impression that she is managing well. But beneath that calm exterior, I know there must be an enormous sense of emptiness. She is missing the conversations, companionship, habits, and shared moments that filled their lives for so many years.

I can only imagine how painful this period must be for her. I hope she knows that she does not have to appear strong all the time, and that she is surrounded by people who love her, understand her, and will continue to support her as she learns to live with this loss.

Dad will always be part of our family and our memories. Although we were not able to say everything we wanted to say at the end, our love for him remains, and so does the life and love he shared with Mum and with all of us.

Grief has begun to teach me what I could not fully see before that love does not always announce itself. Sometimes it is silent, enduring, and woven so deeply into the fabric of your life that you only recognise its shape when it is gone. I am no longer angry in the same way. The sharpness has softened into something heavier, something more difficult to carry. It is the weight of missing him, not just in the big moments, but in all the small, ordinary ones that now feel incomplete. I did not get to say goodbye. But perhaps, in all the years we shared, in all the quiet ways he showed his love, he had already said everything that mattered. And in this silence, I feel most deeply what I have lost, not just my father, but the quiet, enduring love he carried so effortlessly.

I love and miss you so much, Daddy. 

– Nur Diyanah Magness – Aug 9, 2026

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Oh dear me, it’s been years since I posted anything on my blog!! Truth be told, Life and adventures simply took over and I relocated from Malaysia to Belgium and now in the United Kingdom. So much has happened since then. Good life events, not so good ones and really sad ones. I even have 2 beautiful grand daughters now, Maryam Jasmine and Aleena Rose. They are such delights that I only get to see twice a year when I travel back to Malaysia. Sadly it has not been so for this year. 2020 has been an unprecedented year for all of us with Covid, Lockdowns, Quarantines and restricted movements. 

My husband and I contracted the virus in March and we are so thankful that we survived it. It really took a huge toll on our bodies and respiratory systems that even until now we are still not 100% the same as before.

Anyway, onto positive stuff — Yesterday I posted one of my lazy ‘go to’ comfort meals on Instagram and Facebook It had an amazing response from friends and family requesting for the recipe. So yes, this is also one main reason why I have  reactivated my blog to share the recipe. Plus, 2020 has been so stressful and I need some blogging therapy to rant, vent, share and start getting my brain juices to work more. ??

Well, now that my reasons and excuses for not blogging are done…lol….let’s get down to business. Sneak preview of my next post —  Ginger Garlic Chicken Pulau.

Sometimes I post my recipes, tips and photography on a few social media sites, so I invite you to subscribe and follow. Subscribe below to never miss a new post or recipe.

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I have learned that the trick to being happy is to enjoy each day as it comes. Don’t wish away your days waiting for better ones. Sometimes we do not realise how big the little things in life really are. I would like to think that being more than half a century old gives me this wisdom ?

I feel exhilarated seeing sunshine enter the room as I open the blinds. Just this little thing is a great start to a lovely day. This puts a smile on me through the day and people tend to reciprocate. The act of smiling at others really makes theirs and my day! That is to say, I receive positive vibes from the Universe.

Catching up with old Friends

Connecting with old friends brings me such sweet memories. Do you feel nostalgia and a warm feeling like I do? Taking time out for a coffee or meal with family and friends is always good for my wellbeing and mental health. Moreover, it improves and tightens my relationship bonds. I have learned this through the years and know it to be true.

Finding the perfect gift for someone can be quite interesting and fun too if you do not let the rat-race of life distract you from enjoying these simple yet meaningful acts. Similarly, listening to little kids talk, praying together, helping an elderly person, doing activities as a family, showing concern for someone who is hurt or ill, all these and more, are the little things in Life.

Do little things together…

The simple act of giving a hug to my loved ones and friends or holding my partner’s hand brings joy and happiness. Listening to the radio or watching a movie together gives enjoyment and a sense of sharing. Taking a walk in the park alone or with others is also a simple thing in life yet so fulfilling, giving one a sense of peace and calm. Planting seeds and seeing them sprout is also so rewarding. Did you know that gardening is great for our health and wellbeing too?

Australian researchers following men and women in their 60s found that those who regularly gardened had a 36% lower risk of dementia than their non-gardening counterparts.

Take Time out…

We just have to take time out to enjoy the little things in life like the wonderful smell of pancakes or roti canai and nasi lemak in the morning. Likewise, Having coffee or teh tarik with old friends. Enjoying the smell and beauty of flowers around us, or taking the time to actually browse a bookstore, all these little things can be fun and make us feel good.

The little things in that connects us to the bigger things….it’s these little things and moments that give us the quality in life. For those who have not already, start living now. Live in the present and enjoy the simple and little things in life. Otherwise, one day you will look back and realise they were the big things.

If you have any thoughts on this, please leave a comment in the comment box below.

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This is how the story goes :

Mom liked to make breakfast food for dinner every now and then. And I remember one night in particular when she had made breakfast after a long, hard day at work. That evening, mom placed a plate of eggs, sausage and extremely burnt biscuits in front of dad. I remember waiting to see if anyone noticed.

All dad did was reach for his biscuit, smiled at mom and asked me how my day was at school. I don’t remember what I told him that night, but I do remember watching him smear butter and jelly on that biscuit and ate every bite.

When I got up from the table, I remember hearing mom apologize to dad for burning the biscuits. And I’ll never forget what he said :

Honey, I love burned biscuits.

Later that night, I went to kiss Daddy good night and asked him if he really liked his biscuits burned. He wrapped me in his arms and said,”Your Momma put in a hard day at work today and she’s real tired. And besides – a little burnt biscuit never hurt anyone!”

You know, life is full of imperfect things…..and imperfect people. I’m not the best at hardly anything, and I forget birthdays and anniversaries just like everyone else.

What I’ve learned over the years is that learning to accept each others’ faults – and choosing to celebrate each others differences – is one of the most important keys to creating a healthy, growing, and lasting relationship.

Because in the end, you are the master of your own life, to be happy or unhappy, to be positive or negative.

We could extend this to any relationship. In fact, understanding is the base of any relationship, be it a husband-wife or parent-child or friendship. Don’t put the key to your happiness in someone else’s pocket – keep it in your own. So please pass me a biscuit, and yes, the burnt one will do just fine

And that’s my prayer for you today. That you learn to take the good, the bad, and the ugly parts of your life and embrace it with patience and a positive acceptance. At the end of the day, we reap what we sow. Our actions and words can either make or break relationships where a burnt biscuit isn’t a deal-breaker!

If you liked this story, then you may also enjoy : A Valuable Lesson about priorities and happiness.

Did you like the burnt biscuit story? Give me your thoughts on it. I would love to know! Leave a comment below.

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An Inspirational Reflection by Flavia Weedn

Some people come into our lives and leave footprints on our hearts and we are never ever the same.

Some people come into our lives and quickly go. Some stay for a while and embrace our silent dreams.
 
They help us become aware of the delicate winds of hope and we discover within every human spirit there are wings yearning to fly.

They help our hearts to see that the only stairway to the stars is woven with dreams and we find ourselves unafraid to reach high.

They celebrate the true essence of who we are and have faith in all that we may become.

Some people awaken us to new and deeper realisations for we gain insight from the passing whisper of their wisdom

Throughout our lives we are sent precious souls meant to share our journey however brief or lasting their stay. They remind us why we are here.

To learn... to teach... to nurture... to love

Some people come into our lives to cast a steady light upon our path and guide our every step. Their shining belief in us helps us to believe in ourselves.

Some people come into our lives to teach us about love. The love that rests within ourselves.

Let us reach out to others and feel the bliss of giving, for love is far richer in action
that it ever is in words.

Some people come into our lives and they move our souls to sing and make our spirits dance.
They help us to see that everything on earth is part of the incredibility of life, and that it is always there for us to take of its joy.

Some people come into our lives and leave footprints on our hearts and we are never ever the same.

Why Some People Change us so Deeply.

Certain people touch us profoundly because they meet us at the intersection of need, readiness, and truth. In that sense, they are less like “nice people we met” and more like catalysts: they accelerate inner processes that were already stirring.

The bittersweet reality is that there is a quiet sorrow in these relationships.

• Some of these people stay only briefly. Their impact is huge; their presence, short.
• Some drift away as life moves, or we outgrow the version of ourselves that knew them.
• Some die, leaving us with gratitude and grief intertwined.

That’s part of what makes the “footprints on our hearts” image so powerful: the person may be gone, but the imprint remains. The transformation they sparked continues to work through us, often in ways they never fully see.

If we accept that some people are sent (by chance, fate, God, or simply the randomness of life) to transform us, then a natural response is:
• Honour them – By remembering, naming, and thanking them, even if only in writing or prayer.
• Live the change – Letting the transformation bear fruit: creating, loving, serving, healing, in line with what they awakened.
• Become that person for others – Not by trying to replicate them, but by allowing our own healed and expanded self to be a safe, believing, truth-telling presence for someone else.

In this light, those profound influences are not just personal blessings; they’re part of a chain. We receive, we integrate, we pass on.

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A story with a simple message that is relevant for all ages. Once you’ve read this short story, you will have to decide if you are a carrot, egg or coffee bean.

A young woman went to her mother and told her about her life and how things were so hard for her. She did not know how she was going to make it and wanted to give up. She was tired of fighting and struggling. It seemed as one problem was solved, a new one arose.

Her mother took her to the kitchen. She filled three pots with water and placed each on a high fire. Soon the pots came to boil. In the first she placed carrots, in the second she placed eggs, and in the last she placed ground coffee beans. She let them sit and boil, without saying a word.

In about twenty minutes she turned off the burners. She fished the carrots out and placed them in a bowl. She pulled the eggs out and placed them in a bowl. Then she ladled the coffee out and placed it in a bowl.

Turning to her daughter, she asked, “Tell me, what do you see?”

“Carrots, eggs, and coffee,” she replied.

Her mother brought her closer and asked her to feel the carrots. She did and noted that they were soft. The mother then asked the daughter to take an egg and break it. After pulling off the shell, she observed the hard boiled egg. Finally, the mother asked the daughter to sip the coffee. The daughter smiled as she tasted its rich aroma. The daughter then asked, “What does it mean, mother?”

Her mother explained that each of these objects had faced the same adversity … boiling water. Each reacted differently.

The carrot went in strong, hard, and unrelenting. However, after being subjected to the boiling water, it softened and became weak.

The egg had been fragile. Its thin outer shell had protected its liquid interior, but after sitting through the boiling water, its inside became hardened.

The ground coffee beans were unique, however. After they were in the boiling water, they had changed the water.

“Which are you?” she asked her daughter. “When adversity knocks on your door, how do you respond? Are you a carrot, an egg or a coffee bean?”

Think of this: Which am I? Am I the carrot that seems strong, but with pain and adversity do I wilt and become soft and lose my strength? Am I the egg that starts with a malleable heart, but changes with the heat? Did I have a fluid spirit, but after a death, a breakup, a financial hardship or some other trial, have I become hardened and stiff? Does my shell look the same, but on the inside am I bitter and tough with a stiff spirit and hardened heart?

Or am I like the coffee bean? The bean actually changes the hot water, the very circumstance that brings the pain When the water gets hot, it releases the fragrance and flavor. If you are like the bean, when things are at their worst, you get better and change the situation around you. When the hour is the darkest and trials are their greatest, do you elevate yourself to another level? How do you handle adversity? Are you a carrot, an egg or a coffee bean?

May you have enough happiness to make you sweet, enough trials to make you strong, enough sorrow to keep you human and enough hope to make you happy.

The happiest of people don’t necessarily have the best of everything; they just make the most of everything that comes along their way. The brightest future will always be based on a forgotten past; you can’t go forward in life until you let go of your past failures and heartaches.

Now, after reading this story, I am sure you will never look at a carrot, egg or coffee bean the same way again. So which one are you? What would your response be when adversity knocks at your door? If you liked this story then you may also like : A vauable Lesson about Priorities and Lessons

I hope you liked this story. Please leave a star rating or comment and let me know your thoughts on it. 

--- Nur Diyanah Magness

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LIFE ISN’T ABOUT WAITING FOR THE STORM TO PASS…
..IT’S LEARNING HOW TO DANCE IN THE RAIN

A VALUABLE LESSON ABOUT PRIORITIES IN LIFE. Did you like this story? I would love to know your thoughts on it. a comment or mention me on facebook @sweetsharings  and tag  #sweetsharings !

If you liked this story, then you may also appreciate Hapiness, Happy Hormones and Moods.

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